Thursday, May 27, 2010

You are under arrest....

Ever imagined that those burly looking cops could have a sense of humor,well after this post you might change your mind.....

Yeah, I do have bank robbers to catch, but that might be dangerous,
so I'm going to play it safe and write you this ticket.

 "Take your hands off the car, or I'll make your
birth certificate a worthless document."

"If you run, you'll only go to jail tired."

"So you don't know how fast you were going. I guess
that means I can write anything I want on the ticket, huh?"

"Yes, Sir, you can talk to the shift supervisor,
but I don't think it will help. Oh . . . did I mention
that I am the shift supervisor?"

Hey John, get out of the cruiser and come over here to say "Thank You." We stopped the guy who pays OUR salary!

What do you mean I won't believe you? Just because you've got three kilos of drugs and two bodies in the trunk doesn't mean there isn't a perfectly reasonable explanation.

Of course you didn't DO it. You just happened to start your morning sprint in front of the department store, the VCR is extra weight, and the security guards were providing MOTIVATION.

She STARTED it? That's the best you can do? My four-year-old does better than that when I ask why his sister is crying.

 "Relax, the handcuffs are tight because they're new.
They'll stretch out after you wear them awhile."

"The answer to this last question will determine whether you are
drunk or not. Was Mickey Mouse a cat or a dog?"

"Yeah, we have a quota. Two more tickets
and my wife gets a toaster oven."

"Just how big were those two beers?"

"You didn't think we give pretty women tickets?
You're right, we don't . . . Sign here.


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