Wednesday, October 20, 2010

This is what we meant!!

From the archives!!!

Actual witty signs found around the earth....

At the electric company: We would be delighted if you send in your bill. However, if you don't, you will be.

In a counselors office: “Growing old is mandatory, growing wise is optional.

At a car dealership: The best way to get back on your feet? Miss a car payment.

At A Laundry Shop: How about we refund your money, send you a new one at no charge, close the store and have the manager shot. Would that be satisfactory?

At an optometrist's office: If you don't see what you're looking for, you've come to the right

In a Florida maternity ward: No children allowed.

Billboard on the side of the road: Keep your eyes on the road and stop reading these signs.

On a restaurant window: Don't stand there and be hungry, come in and get fed up.

In the front yard of a funeral home: Drive carefully. We’ll wait.

In the offices of a New Jersey loan company: Ask about our plans for owning your home.

On the window of a Kentucky appliance store: Don't kill your wife. Let our washing machine do the dirty work.

In a Veterinarian’s waiting room: “Be back in 5 minutes, Sit! Stay!”

In the window of an Oregon general store: Why go elsewhere to be cheated, when you can come here?

On a desk in a reception room: We shoot every 3rd salesman, and the 2nd one just left.

Sign at the psychic’s Hotline: “Don’t call us, we’ll call you.”

On a maternity room door: Push. Push. Push.

 Outside a second-hand store: We exchange anything - bicycles, washing machines etc. Why not bring your wife along and get a wonderful bargain.

Inside a Bowling Alley: “Please be quiet, we need to hear a pin drop.”
Pizza shop slogan: “7 days without pizza makes one Weak.”

In a Nonsmoking Area: “If we see smoking we will assume you are on fire and take appropriate action.”

On an Electricians truck: “Let us remove your shorts.”

If you enjoyed this you will also enjoy you think its obvious and subtle humor 


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